Saturday, March 12, 2011

Best Dad Ever

I am so jealous of Kurt Hummel. He has the best dad. Watching him have THE TALK with Kurt this week was fabulous. I don't know a lot of parents with straight kids who did that well when their time came.

We all know Burt Hummel (played marvelously by Mike O'Malley) is a great dad. He was totally cool when Kurt told him he was gay. On top of that, he kicked Finn out when he used the word “faggy” even though he knew it might jeopardize his relationship with Finn's mother. Kurt can be himself and he knows that his dad has got his back.

Every child deserves a parent like Burt Hummel. Too bad most of us don't get one.

Both of my parents went to their graves without knowing a thing about my sexuality. Or anything else really. My father left when I was four. My mother tried to kill me when I was 12. After that I went to live with my sister and her family. I only saw her when I was forced to and I tried not to talk to her at all.

I never got The Talk. I had to do my own research (insert pervy joke here). For most of it I had to rely on the guys whose only goal was getting into my pants. You know how well that usually turns out.

I do remember one dinner table conversation when my brother and his wife were over. Some how we got talking about the meaning of earrings on men. Supposedly if it was in the left he was gay and in the right ear it meant he was straight. I think. I'm not really sure I'm remembering it correctly. Any way I had one hole in my left ear and two in my right.

My brother asked me what that meant I was. At that time I was deflecting questions about my sexuality with a standard response: “Does it matter? It seems that the only reason it would matter was if you wanted to have sex with me.”

Have you ever seen four adults choke and spray food at the same time? It was awesome. My family never questioned me about anything personal after that. It made a lot of things easier. Still it would have been nice to have someone to turn to.

I couldn't turn to anyone in my Catholic school. I was already in trouble for reading The Satanic Bible in the back of ethics class. What? I was curious. Turns out that book was really funny. The head of the ethics department called me his problem child because more than one teacher came to him with “concerns” about me.

That's without any of them knowing I was bisexual.

It's no wonder my inner teenager really wants Mr. Hummel to adopt her.

Images: Screencaps from Preggers and Theatricality.

Read my other Glee related posts here

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